Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Monday and Tuesday

Monday- I did pretty good with my food and I worked out.

Meal #1- Ezekiel cereal w/ soy milk and banana

Meal#2- sauteed veggies and brown rice

Meal#3- a few grapes

Meal#4- (pre workout) 1/4 cup brown rice w/ corn, 1/4 cup pinto beans, salsa and lettuce

a few pretzels and 2 tbsp guacamole

Meal#5- (post workout) Ezekiel cereal w/ soy milk and banana

Workout: Cardio Power Resistance (Insanity DVD)


Tuesday: Another good day of food and workout.

Food Journal:

Meal #1- tofu scramble w/ potatoes and spinach

a few pretzel sticks

Meal#2- sauteed mushrooms, zucchini, and bean sprouts. 1 small piece of whole wheat sourdough bread w/ Earth Balance.

Meal#3- (snack) grapes and raw cashews

Meal#4- (pre workout) small sandwich: pinto beans, avocado, sauteed onions and hot sauce on whole wheat sourdough bread

Meal#5- (post workout) smoothie: soy milk, frozen berries, banana and unsweetened cocoa powder

Meal #6- tofu with spinach and salsa

Workout: Pure Cardio DVD (Insanity)

These workouts are definitely challenging and right now I still hate them. I really do! I do them because I know that I will see results if I am consistant with them and eat well. I am still working on eating well. :)))))

The fitness goals that I have require me to push harder and take things to the next level. I can't see change if I am not willing to do something different than what my body is already used to. I am determined to wear tanks tops and shorts this summer and feel lean and fit....so I have to keep pushing.

I know I can do it one step at a time. Just like I achieved running the 1/2 marathon. When I thought I couldn't I just kept pushing and guess what......I did it!

Monday, March 28, 2011

Friday/ Saturday/ Sunday

I did good on my eating but not so good on working out. I did workout on Friday. I did my Insanity pure cardio DVD and it was of course INSANE. I was sweating like a piggy just after the intense warm up. My daughters best friend slept over from Friday til Sunday afternoon so I didn't workout on Saturday. I took them to the movies after work. I did do a lot of walking and climbing stairs on Friday and Sunday while checking vacant apartments at work. I checked about 45 apartments between those two days. That counts towards positive activity too. :) My eating was pretty clean but I did eat some sweets because I was craving them and couldn't resist. :( I didn't eat bad bad treats but I still felt guilt for eating them. I had a few bites of a chocolate cake from Whole Foods and a few homemade cookies I made (no sugar added). On Saturday I also had 1/2 cup of non dairy ice cream with fresh strawberries and banana. Not bad but still not a part of my plan. It is kind of hard to resist when that time of the month starts knocking on my door. :) But I won't beat myself up about it because that is not positive. It also doesn't create a positive relationship with food. When we allow ourselves to feel guilty that doesn't put us in a positive mood for change. We have to stay positive and move forward if we want to see positive results. GUILT is not a seed I want to sow. So I will keep pressing along this journey and make conscious decisions every time I eat. If I eat something I shouldn't be eating then I will make peace with it and move on. It's not an excuse to eat poorly but I acknowledge those days will come. I would rather except them and move on than dwell in them and create more of them because I am depressed over the bad choices I made. You get it? Today is the beginning of a new week and I will have a great one!!! See you in a few days with an update.

Friday, March 25, 2011

In the Beginning

In the beginning you were perfect. Then life happened....the cracks were created and your perception began to change.

One day you looked up and didn't recognize the person you saw. Your dreams slowly began to fade and you began to crumble beneath the weight of your burdens.

You lost sight of the truth. You lost sight of yourself. You fell asleep.......

Awaken.....set your self free.

Walk in the truth of the spirit and reach higher than you can see.

Beneath the layers of disappointment and pain there still lies the perfect vessel.

Nothing ever changed. You were always perfect.


It's time to fulfill your dreams.

Get moving

The only way to get there is to move. You must move in the direction of your dreams and never let anything or anyone stop you.

Your dreams and your visions were all created by the hand of God and in Him you will find the manifestation and fulfilment of them.

Never settle for less

Never compromise

Never give up

Push harder

Love deeper

Stand stronger

Let the strength of your spirit carry you.

You have what it takes so get started.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

From me to you......A personal journey

“The weight you are seeking to let go of was added to your consciousness before it was added to your body. Your body is merely a screen onto which is projected the nature of your thoughts. When the weight is gone from your consciousness, it will be gone from your physical experience. In asking God to remove the cause, you automatically remove the effect”. -A Course in Weight Loss by Marianne Williamson

I read this amazing quote the other day and it totally confirmed many of the beliefs I have about weight issues. Whether you are overweight or underweight the issue is not the external weight. You can not address the weight problems without addressing the cause of them.

For me it was many years of emotional and physical abuse and abandonment. I didn't feel worthy of love. I felt so insecure about myself so I decided to hide behind layers of unhealthy fat. Not only was I overweight but my spirit was heavy.

I suffered from depression, anxiety and fear. I was a prisoner of my own thoughts....a victim of my emotions. This is what caused me to project the lack of discipline outwardly on my body. Years of emotional eating and a lack of personal responsibility for my life lead me to weigh 245lbs.

I blamed my emotional and physical state on everyone that hurt me and abandoned me. It was easier to reflect my fears on others rather than take control of my life and make changes. After living on a roller coaster for several years I decided enough was enough.

How could I help others, encourage them and speak about being free in God's love when I was not manifesting it in my own life. I had to be a reflection of what I was speaking. I had to take control of my life and take responsibility for everything that was happening.

I couldn't keep feeling defeated. I wasn't willing to compromise my mental, physical and spiritual health anymore. So I decided to educate myself. I prayed and asked God to direct my path....to open my mind and heal my heart.

For years I had worked on my spiritual and mental well being and now I needed that to reflect externally. So the work began. I didn't pray for the situation that caused me to become overweight to go away. I prayed that I would be strengthened in it and that the spiritual part of me would take over. I basically prayed to be released from the egoic mind and surrendered my will for the will of God.

That prayer lead me on this journey and I am happy to say that I am stronger than I used to be. I am still traveling this road and I am still learning but I am proud of the progress I have made.

My passion is to help others. What ever platform I am given to manifest this passion I will take. So I pray that my story encourages you. I pray that your heart be opened and that you would release all that has caused you to become unhealthy.

Surrender the things you have no control of and take control of those that you do. Know that in the end you will be a testimony and encouragement for someone else. Your struggle is not your own......you are not alone. In all that you do you have the knowledge and support available to help you achieve your dreams if you would open yourself up and just believe it is possible.

Papi's Girl

Tuesday/ Wednesday/ Thursday

Tuesday, I did not get to workout because I was extremely tired from my weekend trip. My body was exhausted from driving to California and back home. It wasn't a long drive but the weekend events plus the driving really had a toll on me.

I went to dinner after work with my mother in law and my daughter, came home cleaned up the house a little, took a shower and went to bed.


Wednesday, was my day off and I did my scheduled workout.....Cardio Power and Resistance (Insanity DVD). The following is what I ate. I had a pretty good day but didn't eat heavy during the day so I snacked more at night. That is usually how it goes so I have to make sure I try to avoid doing that.

Meal #1: smoothie (frozen strawberries, banana, water)
Meal#2: veggie salad (romaine lettuce, fajita veggies, pico de gallo, hot salsa, guacamole and black beans), water
Meal#3: grilled cheese sandwich (whole wheat bread, daiya cheese, 2 slices of smart bacon, spinach and avocado), a small bowl of Ezekiel cereal w/ soy milk and banana
Snacks: pretzels, veggie chips w/ salsa, grapes (I ate these snacks within a 4 hour time frame. I ate them in very small amounts and they were pretty healthy but I am still trying to avoid eating after a certain time. I did stay up until 1am so that is also the reason why I was hungry after dinner.)

Thursday, I tried to sleep in and recover from my long weekend. I sent my daughter off to school and forced myself to sleep a few more hours. Since I am trying to live a healthier more active lifestyle I noticed that I don't like to sleep in....so I must force myself to rest sometimes.

I know sleeping is a very important part of being healthy and allowing my body to heal after a stressful work week and Insane workout program. :) So I am happy to say I slept in until about 11am. Then I got up and clean my house and did laundry.....boy can those dirty clothes really stack up.

Workout: Cardio Recovery (Insanity DVD)
This DVD is an active cardio recovery workout. It allows your body to recover from all the jumping and heavy pounding that the Insanity cardio DVD's inflict on the body. BUT it is still a very intense workout. It involves a lot of stretching and deep muscle movements like squats and lunges. Yoga stretches and ab work are also incorporated. Awesome recovery DVD!

My food intake was rather good. I wasn't hungry very much today but I did eat well.
Meal#1: 3/4 c Ezekiel cereal w/ soy milk and banana
Snack: a few roasted almonds and a Lara all fruit bar
Meal#2: 1/4 c brown rice pasta w/ tomato sauce and 1 c. broccoli
Meal#3: 3 small slices of homemade veggie pizza
Dessert: 3 small cookies (homemade and vegan:) I shouldn't have eaten these because I am trying to avoid all processed sugar right now.

I think I did pretty well. I am disappointed I did not workout on Tuesday but I know I needed the extra rest. If I push myself when my body feels weak I usually get sick. That would have only set me back even more. :) Always listen to your body.

Things I Like to Keep in My Kitchen

I had such a difficult time with this video because I was trying to keep it under 15 minutes. I did other really good videos prior to this with more information but they were too long and I am not good at editing videos yet. I am a newbie to this vlogging thing so please be kind.

I don't have a hard time speaking in front of people. I have a hard time with the technical part of vlogging. So here is my first video ever posted. I hope you enjoy it. I hope to make more of them with more nutritional information.

I am not a nutritionist but I have studied a little bit of plant based nutrition and have read several books on the subject as well.

As you might be able to tell with my prior blog posts I am not too obsessed with losing weight although I have about 25-30 lbs to lose to reach my desired weight. I am more concerned about being healthy. Nutrition is something that can not be compromised.

I do wish to change my external appearance by achieving a slimmer physique but my ultimate goal has always been to be confident in myself regardless and to take control of my health by eating healthy plant based foods and staying active.

So I really want my vlog and blog to reflect that. I thought it would be great to show you the things I like to keep in my kitchen and share a little bit of what I know. :)

Thanks for watching.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Recipes: Tofu Tacos and Chocolate Chip Cookies

Tofu Tacos (from YouTube vlog)

1 container of organic firm tofu (rinsed, drained and crumbled)
1/2 cup chunky salsa
garlic powder
onion powder
ground cumin
sea salt
corn tortillas
guacamole or avocado slices
salsa for garnish

Heat tofu in a pan until most of the moisture has been absorbed. Add your desired amount of garlic powder, onion powder, cumin and sea salt. Add salsa and mix into tofu mixture. Adjust seasoning to your liking and warm up corn tortillas.

Put a spoonful of tofu mixture on the tortilla, add a spoon of avocado and salsa, fold and enjoy. I like to add fresh spinach to my tacos as well.

Tip: You can add whatever seasonings you prefer. I personally love garlic and cumin for a Mexican twist. You can also add spinach to pan and allow it to wilt before serving. Shredded potatoes, onion and peppers are also yummy when added to tofu scramble mixture.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 cup of unsweetened applesauce
2 large ripe bananas
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 tsp ground flaxseed mixed with 6 tsp of water (egg replacer)
1 tsp baking soda
2 1/4 cup whole wheat flour
1/4 tsp sea salt
2 tsp turbinado sugar
1 tsp cinnamon
1 cup chocolate chips (vegan)

Mix applesauce, ripe bananas, vanilla, flaxseed mixture, sea salt, turbinado sugar, and cinnamon in a food processor. Mix flour and baking soda in a large mixing bowl. Add wet mixture to flour mixture and mix. Add chocolate chips.

Put spoonfuls of batter on a cookie sheet and bake for 8-10 minutes in 375 degree oven. Cookies are done when they begin to brown.

Enjoy and let me know what you think.

Note: You don't have to add the sugar. My daughter prefers her cookies a little sweeter so I added at little to this recipe. Any sugar will work but I try to avoid white refined sugar. Stevia is also a great natural sugar alternative. Please stay away from Splenda...it is chemical garbage that is not healthy for your body.

Monday, March 21, 2011

The Workout I LOVE TO HATE

I am recommitting myself to the Insanity workout program. I started it about 3 weeks ago but didn't do it consistently. Why? Ummmm because it is completely INSANE.

I totally love the challenge but it is so challenging that it often makes me want to cry...lol! So enough of being a baby. Right?

It's time to act like a big girl and do what it takes to make this program work. I don't have the time to come on here and blog everyday but I will keep a journal and then come and update each week or more often if I can.

As part of my recommitment I have given myself a month to be extremely disciplined to see what I can accomplish. This means eating really clean, eliminating all refined sugars and processed foods and only eating carbs before 4pm.

It also means I must get at least 8 hrs of sleep per night. This is essential for body recovery. I tend to over do my workouts at times and then end up getting sick because I don't give my body time to rest and recover.

Oh and most importantly I will be working on my vision and motivation board this week. I really believe in meditating and encouraging yourself through your journey. We are so bombarded with daily chores and life in general that we tend to go on autopilot and lose sight of our goals. Having a clear vision of them on paper and looking at them daily helps to keep you motivated and encouraged.

Meditation has been a huge part of my success this far. It continues to be what I lean on when the times get tough. I must create a strong mind in order to have a strong, healthy body. :)

Here is my workout schedule for this week. I will only be doing INSANITY. If for some reason I am not able to do a scheduled DVD I will substitute with another video. BUT I MUST workout every day I am scheduled to do so. Please check in with me and help keep me accountable.

I will post before and after pics after this month is over. I will also post my weight even though I don't like obsessing over it. :)

Monday: Rest
Tuesday: Plyometric Cardio Circuit
Wednesday: Cardio Power and Resistance
Thursday: Cardio Recovery
Friday: Pure Cardio
Saturday: Plyometric Cardio Circuit
Sunday: Rest!!!!!!!!!! ( I am sure I will need it and maybe a stretcher too)

Wish me luck!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Papi's Girl

So I was asked why I chose the name Papi's girl as my user name. I chose that name because it means Daddy's girl in Spanish. I am not a daddy's girl in the natural sense. Although I love my natural father I don't have a strong enough relationship with him to use that term.

That leads me to the true meaning of the word "Papi's Girl". As a child I grew up not feeling loved or wanted by my parents. As an adult I would often feel lonely, depressed or as if no one cared for me. It was a very sad feeling.

Those feelings caused me to become very dependant on others for my happiness. I based my emotions on how others treated me and my self worth on how they valued me. After break ups and a trouble marriage I was depleted.

I didn't know how to pick myself back up. I didn't know how to trust again and I definitely never thought I could love again. I essentially felt worthless and unlovable.

This is where my relationship with God was created. My depleted soul was thirsty for love and I began to seek a deeper meaning to life.

I later realized that I was never alone, I was worthy of love, my life was priceless and I was the daughter of a KING. My natural father may have not been around but My Heavenly Father never left my side.

Through heartache and pain...... feelings of grief and sadness.....I was strengthened by His unconditional love.

I also understood that everything that happened in my life was purposeful because it lead me to an awakening that began to set me free.

I once seeked to be accepted by man but in God I found my life and through Him I breathe. I no longer need anyone to show me what I am worth or tell me who or what I am. I know that I am Daddy's girl and in God I find all things.


Welcome to my new followers. I am so happy you chose to come by and check out my blog. I hope you will continue to check in on my journey and keep me accountable. Please feel free to lend me any tips you may have or root me on.

I have had this blog for over a year so I hope you check out a few of my old blogs to see how far I have come. The journey has been long and some days have been shaky but I am still traveling and looking forward to accomplishing some amazing things.

My goals for this year are to shed another 30 lbs by the end of the year, get my personal training certification, continue to inspire others to live a healthier life, and complete my second 1/2 marathon.....MAYBE a full marathon..LOL!

I like to log my food intake as well as my workout activity. I am not always able to update it daily but I will try my best to do update every week. If you have any questions or tips please feel free to leave comments.

Once again, thanks for joining my blog. I look forward to getting to know you and maybe inspiring or encouraging you to make some healthy changes in your life.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011


My heart was touched today by my little princess. She told me about a movie she watched at school. It was about a group of climbers that climbed Mt. Everest. She said one of the climbers had the same name as me.

She said it reminded her of my journey. She said "mommy you are standing at the top of the mountain now and looking over your life.......you are over it...........you are doing things that you wished you could do".

That touched me so deeply because I remember thinking I would never reach the top. I remember a time in my life when I didn't feel hope. I didn't think I would ever stop hurting or feeling depressed.

Although there are still days or moments that I get a little down I am able to reach a peaceful place in my heart and rejoice in the abundant blessing I am walking in. I am still on this amazing journey and I still have many things to accomplish but I am at the top.

To me this means that I am over the past and I am pressing forward with determination. I can only see joy and blessings from this point on. I can now see God's glory in every part of my life and give Him thanks for being my constant companion.

I have learned that what I focus on most is what becomes dominant in my life. I spent too many years focused on what was wrong instead of rejoicing in the good.

I looked at the opposition instead of realizing that it was a set up for opportunity. Every adversity was a chance to press forward and grow stronger through the resistance.

My eyes have seen amazing things. My heart has loved unconditionally. My mind now has the capacity to create endless possibilities.

I have grown. I have strived and I have overcome. I am so grateful.


Black Bean Brownies

I got this yummy recipe for the Happy Herbivore website. I advise that you check it out because they have some great looking recipes on there. I tried this one today but made a few minor variations to make it with less sugar and calories.


15 oz black beans, drained and rinsed
2 whole bananas ( I used 3 since I didn't use agave)
1/3 c. agave nectar (I didn't use this instead I used 1/4 c. unsweetened apple sauce)
1/4 c. unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tbsp cinnamon
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 c. raw sugar (optional) ( I used 1/8 c.)
1/4 c. instant oats (I used 1/2 c. rolled oats and 1/8 c. whole wheat flour)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease an 8x8 pan and set aside. Combine all ingredients, except instant oats, in a food processor or blender and blend until smooth, scrapping sides as needed. Stir in oats and pour batter into the pan. Bake approximately 30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Allow to cool before slicing.
Note: If using rolled oats instead of instant oats you can blend them with the rest of the ingredients in the food processor or blender.

Enjoy and let me know what you think. The variation I made is not so sweet which is perfect for my palate but if you like your brownies a little sweeter then you might want to adjust the amount of sugar you use until it satisfies your taste buds.

Tip: Using ripe bananas helps sweeten your brownie mixture without the added fat and calories from refined sugar.


90 day Supreme Cardio Challenge
I was invited to a Mary Kay party so I didn't have time to do my Insanity workout. Instead I did another one with 15 and 20 lb weights. I still got an amazing workout so I was happy.

I went to dinner with some friends and did not have time to workout.

Insanity Pure Cardio (WOWZERS!!!!!!!) That is all I can really say.

Ok....Let me try to explain this madness so you can understand. The DVD starts with about 15 minutes of warm up and stretching. The warm up alone is INSANE. You start round one slow and then each round after that is faster until you feel like your head is going to blow up...LOL!

The warm up alone includes jumping jacks, running in place, high knees, butt kicks, mummy kicks, and much much more followed by a very good stretch.

Then the "cardio" ....(as if you didn't get enough already) kicks in. This includes football drills, push up jacks, suicide runs, jumping lunges, ski jumps, and a whole lot more.

The funny thing about this DVD is that even the people on the video are dying and lying on the ground moaning. The instructor has to tell them to go take a break so they can regroup...LOL! The instructor Shaun T does the video with you so that is awesome too. I hate when instructors just dictate and tell you to push harder and they are standing there looking cute without a drop of sweat.

Half way through this video all the men have taken off their shirts. That's my kind of workout..LOL!

I was not feeling well due to my YKW. I had a headache and felt really weak. I tried my best to load up on iron by eating lots of veggies. I thought it was best that I relaxed so that I wouldn't run my body down and end up getting sick again.

My official rest day. No workout.

Not too bad but I wish I could have worked out more. I hate living upstairs because I can't do what I want when I want. If I could I would get up early and workout but that would disturb my neighbor.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Insane Insane Insane

I started a new workout routine. I was originally doing the Supreme 90 workout but I stopped it to start a new program. I really wanted some challenging cardio and I sure got it.

I started doing INSANITY. Let me just say that it lives up to it's name. I can't say I love it though because it is soooooooooo challenging. I do enjoy the challenge but it is intense and it takes a lot of effort to get through.

I do a lot of grunting and screaming to get through the workout. It is pretty funny. The other day I actually started crying because it took me to another level. It made me dig deeper inside myself and reach beyond my perceived limitations.

It is kind of like when I started training for the marathon. I had to tap into another part of me that is beyond what I see externally. When I think I can't do it I push harder and do it anyways.

So far I feel great. My body feels great and I am excited to see my progress after the first two weeks. I have to go downstairs to my mother in law's when I do the DVD because there are a lot of plyometric moves that require me to jump. I don't want to disturb the lady downstairs..LOL!

So today was day 4 of my workout and it was cardio recovery day. We did a lot of deep muscle moves and stretches. Pretty awesome! BUT it's back to the INSANITY tomorrow.

I noticed that my taste buds have changed a lot too. I can't even eat candy because it is way to sweet for me. I am happy and grateful for that.

Monday: Fit Test
Tuesday: Plyometric cardio circuit
Wednesday: (AM) Cardio Power Resistance (Insanity)/ (PM) 20 minute of Ultimate Ball (Supreme 90)
Thursday: Cardio Recovery

Can't remember everything I ate this week but it was good.
Today I ate:
Meal 1: 1/4 cup brown rice, pinto beans, salsa
Meal 2: 1/2 cup brown rice, mixed veggies, med. banana
Snack: all fruit bar
Meal 3: humms veggie wrap, grapes, 5 plantain chips
Meal 4: (vegan) grilled cheese sandwhich (daiya cheese, sourdough bread, smart bacon, spinach, tomato, hot sauce), 1 cup of homemade tomato soup w/ spinach.
Dessert: small piece of a homemade vegan brownie